How God Turned My Pain into Purpose and Birthed Mom of Sons™
Scripture Focus: Isaiah 61:3 (NIV)
“…to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.”
There are moments when you sit quietly, reflect on your life, and become overwhelmed by the goodness of God. Today is one of those moments for me.
As I sit here writing, tears begin to fall. Not because I am living in the pain of yesterday, but because I am remembering the faithfulness of a God who brought me through every painful season of my life.
I think about the times He delivered me from hurt, harm, danger, betrayal, disappointment, and disrespect. I think about the nights when the pain was overwhelming, the tears seemed endless, and I wondered how I would ever find my way back to peace.
And yet, here I am. Still standing. Still trusting. Still loving. Still believing. And most importantly, still witnessing the goodness of God.
When I look back over my life, I realize that some of my most painful experiences became the very places where God would eventually reveal His purpose for me.
He truly gave me beauty for ashes. And that beauty began with two precious gifts.
My boys, Brandon and Jaeden.
Two Different Seasons, Twenty Years Apart
I never wanted to be a single mother. That was never the life I envisioned for myself or my children.
Like so many women, I dreamed of marriage, family, stability, and raising my children in a loving, two-parent home. I wanted to build a life with someone who shared my commitment to love, family, and faith. But my story unfolded differently.
When my first marriage ended the disappointment was devastating. The dreams I had for my family were shattered, and I found myself navigating motherhood while trying to heal from the pain of a broken relationship. But even in that painful season, God had given me something beautiful. My firstborn son, Brandon. The joy he brought into my life! The focus, and unconditional love.
He was my introduction to motherhood, my first experience of loving someone with a depth I had never known before. His smile, his laughter, his little arms reaching for me reminded me that even though my marriage had ended, my life was still filled with purpose.
I had a son to love, nurture, protect, guide, and cover in prayer. And with God’s grace, I continued moving forward. I grew. I learned. I healed. I rebuilt my life. And eventually, I opened my heart to love and marriage again.
But twenty-eight years later, I would find myself walking through another devastating season. Another marriage broken. Another experience of disappointment, and heartbreak. Twenty-eight years later, and the pain felt so familiar. I had already walked this road. I had already experienced the tears, the disappointment, and the grief of watching a marriage fall apart.
And now, here I was again. Different season. Different marriage. Different circumstances. But the same kind of hurt. I never imagined that after surviving the heartbreak of my first marriage, I would experience the devastation of another broken marriage two decades later.
There is something especially painful about finding yourself in a place you prayed you would never have to visit again. But even then, God had not abandoned me. Because in this season, too, He had entrusted me with another beautiful gift. My youngest son, Jaeden.
Another precious life. Another source of joy. Another reminder that God’s goodness was still present, even when my circumstances were painful.
Two different seasons of heartbreak. Two beautiful sons. A faithful God.
And today, I can see something I could not fully understand while I was living through those experiences. The woman who walked through the second heartbreak was not the same exact woman who had experienced the first. I had grown in my faith. I had witnessed God’s delivering power.
I was learning what it meant to depend on Him when life didn’t make sense. I had no choice… I HAD to depend on Him… the pain this time was more intense, and harder to endure. Maybe because I didn’t want to give up. It’s harder when you go through something a second time… you don’t want to fail.
But I knew the ONE who had carried me before. And I learned to trust that He would carry me again.
My Boys Were the Beauty from the Ashes
My sons were the beauty God allowed to rise from the ashes.
Brandon and Jaeden were not responsible for healing my broken heart. They were never meant to carry the weight of their mother’s disappointments or repair the damage left by failed relationships. That was God’s responsibility, and He was faithful to do His work within me.
But my boys were a light in my life. Through the darkest seasons, their presence reminded me that there was still so much to be thankful for. Their laughter brought joy into moments of sadness. Their smiles brightened days when life felt heavy. Their milestones gave me reasons to celebrate, even while I was navigating my own personal struggles.
And being their mother gave me an assignment greater than the pain I was experiencing. I had lives to nurture. Hearts to protect.
Character to help develop. Prayers to pray. And two boys to raise into men who would know the love, wisdom, and faithfulness of God.
There were days when I had to encourage them while needing encouragement myself. Days when I had to be strong even though I felt weak. Nights when I prayed over them and asked God to strengthen me. But through it all, God sustained us.
Today, when I look at my sons, I don’t see the broken marriages. I see God’s faithfulness. I see answered prayers. I see His grace. I see two wonderful lives that have brought immeasurable joy into mine. And I am reminded that what happened to me did not cancel what God had planned for me.
God Is the Greatest Chess Player EVER!!
Let me tell you something I say to my boys all the time. “God is the best chess player EVER! His moves are UNMATCHED!” And I mean that with everything in me! Think about the game of chess. Every move matters.
Sometimes a piece must be repositioned. Sometimes a move that appears insignificant becomes important later. Sometimes what looks like a setback is actually part of a greater strategy. And isn’t that just like God?
We see the immediate situation, but He sees the entire picture. We see the heartbreak, but He sees the healing that is possible. We see the closed door, but He knows the direction He is leading us. We see what has been lost, but He knows what can still be restored, developed, and brought forth.
Isaiah 46:10 reminds us that God makes known the end from the beginning.
I have truly learned to trust that truth! There were moments when I could not understand what was happening in my life when I wondered how something so painful could ever produce anything good. Moments when I questioned the direction my life was taking. But God was still moving. Even when I couldn’t see His hand, I was learning to trust His heart.
He was strengthening me, developing my faith, and teaching me to depend on Him in ways I had never experienced before. And when I look at where I am today, I can only shake my head in amazement.
Because who could have imagined that the very experiences that left me brokenhearted would become part of the testimony God would use to encourage other women? Who could have imagined that my journey through motherhood, including the disappointments, sacrifices, struggles, and victories, would become the foundation for a ministry?
Not once did God lose sight of me. He knew the woman I was. He knew the mother I was becoming. And He knew the assignment that He would one day place in my hands.
Oh, ABBA! Your moves are unmatched!
From Brokenness to Assignment: The Birth of Mom of Sons™
This is the part of my testimony that brings the tears. I never wanted to be a single mother. Yet today, God has entrusted me with a ministry centered on motherhood.
Mom of Sons™.
Just think about that for a moment. The woman who once cried over the loss of her dreams for marriage and family is now encouraging other women to embrace their God-given assignment of raising sons.
The mother who walked through two painful seasons of heartbreak, twenty years apart, is now writing devotionals, prayers, articles, and workbooks to strengthen mothers in every season of motherhood.
The woman who sometimes wondered how she would make it through is now reminding mothers everywhere: “You were chosen for this!” What an amazing God!
NOTHING IS WASTED WITH GOD!
He took the lessons I learned, the faith I developed, the wisdom I gained, and the love I poured into my sons and began shaping something greater than I could have imagined. Mom of Sons™ was not birthed from a perfect motherhood experience. It was birthed from a real journey.
A journey filled with prayer, sacrifice, tears, joy, mistakes, lessons, perseverance, and unconditional love. It came from a mother who didn’t always have the answers but knew where to go to find them. A mom who learned to trust God through every season and a mom who understands that raising sons is not simply about preparing boys to become successful men, but about helping them develop the character, integrity, compassion, strength, and faith of Kingdom men.
And somewhere along this journey, I began to understand something profound. While I was raising my sons, God was also raising me into the woman He has called me to be.
He was developing my strength, teaching me to forgive, restoring my confidence, and healing wounds I have carried for years.
And He also showed me that my identity was never dependent upon whether someone chose to love me, remained faithful to me, or stayed in my life. My identity was established long before those relationships ever began.
I was already known. Already chosen. Already loved. Already SEEN by my Heavenly Father.
And what a beautiful powerful revelation that has become in my life!
He Turned My Midnight into Day
Psalm 30:5 reminds us that weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.
I know what it means to experience some long nights. Nights when the tears would not stop. Nights when I had to surrender the life I thought I would have and trust God with the life unfolding before me.
But morning came. Not always when I wanted it to. Not always the way I expected it. But praise God morning came! And with each new season, God was restoring something within me. My peace, joy, confidence, understanding of His love, and my willingness to trust Him.
He was teaching me that rejection did not determine my worth. That betrayal could wound me without defining me. And that heartbreak did not have the authority to cancel my purpose.
I look at Brandon and Jaeden today, and my heart overflows with gratitude. They are two different young men, with their own personalities, gifts, experiences, and callings. Yet both have been beautiful blessings in my life. And through them, God has taught me lessons about unconditional love, patience, sacrifice, faith, and perseverance that I could never have learned from a textbook.
They have been part of the greatest assignment of my life. Motherhood.
And now that assignment has expanded beyond the walls of my home. Through Mom of Sons™, I have the privilege of walking alongside other mothers, grandmothers, godmothers, aunts, stepmothers, and guardians who have been entrusted with raising boys.
Encouraging them. Praying with them. Reminding them that they are not alone. And helping them understand that motherhood, in every season, can be a beautiful ministry.
To the Mother Who Is Still Sitting in the Ashes
Sis, I don’t know what your story looks like today. Maybe you’re raising your son alone, and that was never your plan. Maybe you’re recovering from a broken marriage or a relationship that left you questioning your worth. Maybe you’re trying to understand why you’ve found yourself facing a painful situation you thought you had already overcome.
Maybe you’ve been betrayed, disappointed, rejected, or disrespected. Maybe you’re smiling on the outside while quietly carrying pain that no one else knows about. I want to encourage you today.
Your ashes are not the end of your story. God sees you. He knows the nights you’ve cried, the prayers you’ve prayed, the sacrifices you’ve made. And He knows the dreams you once held so tightly.
I can’t tell you that every situation will turn out the way you hoped. I can’t promise that every relationship will be restored or that every disappointment will suddenly make sense.
But I can testify that God is able to bring healing, peace, wisdom, and purpose out of the most difficult, painful circumstances.
Don’t allow what happened to you convince you that nothing beautiful can happen through you. Your pain is real, but so is God’s healing power.
Your disappointment may be great, but His love is greater. And even if you can’t see what He is doing right now, you can trust that He has not forgotten you and He is working on your behalf!
Remember, Sis:
You are not defined by who walked away. You are defined by the One who has promised never to leave you nor forsake you.
And while you’re trusting God to heal your heart, continue covering your sons in prayer. Continue speaking life over them. Continue nurturing their gifts, strengthening their faith, and reminding them of who they are in Christ.
Because even in hard seasons, God can do a beautiful work in both the mother and the son.
Looking Back, All I Can Say Is Thank You Abba!
As I sit here today, wiping tears from my eyes, my heart is filled with gratitude.
Every time He protected me from danger. Every time He strengthened me when I thought I couldn’t take another step. Every time He restored my peace after disappointment.
And I thank Him for my boys. Brandon and Jaeden. Two sons born in different seasons of my life. Two sons who have brought me immeasurable joy. Two sons who remind me that even in the midst of heartbreak, God was still blessing my life.
I would never have chosen betrayal, broken promises, or the disappointment of two failed marriages. But I would choose my boys a thousand times over. And I would never trade the privilege of being their mother.
Today, I can look back and see God’s fingerprints throughout my journey. From pain to purpose. From ashes to beauty. And from a mother simply trying to navigate life’s difficult seasons to a woman walking in her God-given assignment. Mom of Sons™.
What an amazing testimony of God’s faithfulness! And as I continue walking in this assignment, I pray that every word I write, every prayer I pray, every devotional I share, and every mother I encourage will bring glory to His name.
Because this is not just my story.
This is my testimony of what happens when God takes the ashes of a woman’s life and brings forth beauty beyond anything she could have imagined.
And to think, He was making moves all along! GOD IS TRULY THE GREATEST CHESS PLAYER EVER! HIS MOVES ARE UNMATCHED!
To God be ALL the glory!
A Mother’s Prayer: Thank You for the Beauty
Heavenly Father,
ABBA, my heart is overwhelmed with gratitude.
As I reflect on my life, I cannot help but thank You for Your faithfulness.
Thank You for every time You brought me through a painful season. Thank You for protecting me from hurt, harm, and danger. Thank You for carrying me when my strength was gone and for loving me when my heart was broken. Father, thank You for Brandon and Jaeden.
Thank You for the privilege of being their mother. Thank You for the joy they have brought into my life and for every lesson You have taught me through motherhood.
Thank You for taking experiences that could have left me bitter and using them to develop compassion, wisdom, strength, and purpose. Thank You for healing the woman while strengthening the mother. And thank You for the assignment of Mom of Sons™.
May this ministry always be a reflection of Your goodness, grace, and faithfulness. Father, I lift up every mother who is walking through her own season of heartbreak. The mom who feels rejected. The mom who has been betrayed, or whose dreams have been shattered.
The mother who is raising her son alone and wondering how she will make it. Remind her that she is never alone. Wrap Your loving arms around her. Restore her peace. Strengthen her faith. Heal the broken places in her heart.
And help her recognize that even in the midst of life’s most difficult circumstances, You are still able to bring forth beauty. Continue guiding us as we raise our sons to become men of faith, integrity, compassion, strength, and purpose.
May our lives and our testimonies always point back to You.
In Jesus’ mighty name, Amen.
Reflection for Moms
As you reflect on your own journey, consider these questions:
- Have you experienced a painful season that God later used to develop your faith or strengthen your character?
- Have you ever found yourself facing a familiar heartbreak in a different season of your life?
- What has motherhood taught you about God’s love, grace, and faithfulness?
- What beauty can you recognize today that you couldn’t see while walking through your most difficult moments?
- How might God use your testimony to encourage another mother?
A Final Word of Encouragement
Sis, never underestimate what God can do with a surrendered life.
Your journey may not have unfolded the way you planned, but that does not mean your life is without purpose. He is still healing. Still restoring. Still strengthening, and still bringing beauty from ashes.
And remember, Mom:
You were chosen for this!
With love, faith, and a grateful heart,
Beverly Taylor Wells
Founder, Mom of Sons™
Raising Sons with Strength, Purpose & Faith Raising Sons to Be Kingdom Men
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